His Eye is on the Sparrow

Why should I feel discouraged,
Why should the shadows come,
Why should my heart feel lonely,
And long for heaven and home...
When Jesus is my portion?
A constant friend is He!
His eye is on the sparrow;
And I know He watches me.

"Let not your heart be troubled",
His tender word I hear,
And resting on His goodness,
I lose my doubts and fears;
Though by the path He leadeth,
But one step I may see.
His eye is on the sparrow;
And I know He watches me.

Whenever I am tempted,
Whenever clouds arise,
When songs give place to sighing,
When hope within me dies,
I draw the closer to Him,
From care He sets me free.
His eye is on the sparrow;
And I know He watches me.

Discovering Joy

Psalm 94: 18-19:
"When I said, 'My foot is slipping',
Your unfailing love, Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me,
Your consolation brought me joy."

I will never forget that moment...when Ryan came to me and said he had decided to take the job in New York. I felt like my world was spinning out of control. I could feel my emotions taking a dive into a downward spiral I was afraid I could never come back from. I truly believed that coming here would ruin me (emotionally speaking). I was completely prepared to enter a deep depression and struggle my way through. I was afraid of what this move would do to me.

So, here we are, one month later. And I stand in awe of what the Lord has done. Not only has He helped me deal with the hardships and staggering life changes we have gone through, but He has inexplicably placed in my heart...JOY! (gasp) How can this be? I can't understand it. Anyone from the outside looking in would think that we have nothing to be thankful for; that we are far worse off than we were before - living in a tiny apartment, facing a bitterly cold climate in an unfamiliar town. But they would be wrong.

The Lord has placed within me a grateful spirit. And what I once thought would be my demise has become a true blessing. Because I am finding light in the darkness. I am seeing the good in every moment. Having a smaller place to live has brought us closer together. The cold weather outside has provided some fun adventures for our family. Maybe having less is a good thing after all. It has made us more thankful for everything we had before; all that we had taken for granted. And it is reminding us of what is really important.

In spite of all the changes and difficulties, our family has never been tighter. Our marriage is thriving. And God is showing Himself in such visible ways that there is no denying His will has brought us here. As Paul says in 2 Corinthians, "Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." He alone deserves the glory...for every good and perfect gift we have is from His hand!!

Movin' On Up...

I had to title this blog entry using the name of the song from the Jeffersons (does anyone remember that show?). Because I joke that where we live now is completely ghetto (which is slightly true, considering it was built in the 60's and hasn't been updated since...and because there are cigarette burn marks on the carpets and the kids found an old cigarette butt in their closet - gross!).

Anyway, we had the sheer joy of going to look for a new apartment last weekend! Ryan's company is paying for us to stay here for 60 days (which will end March 1st) and then they pay for us to move into a rental property of our choice (as long as we stay within the budget they've given us) for 6 months. So, we went and looked at two different places and I have to say, I've never been so excited! The one we decided on is a townhome with our own private entrance, attached garage, dishwasher (squeal!), washer & dryer (shriek!) and the best part...a full finished basement!! I am beside myself.

The funniest part was that when we went looking, I was fully expecting to get a 3-bedroom place. But, when we were walking through that model, the kids were so upset thinking they'd be in separate rooms. They have so enjoyed being together and they've gotten used to it! It really is sweet to see their little friendship blossom. Anyway, they pleaded with us to get the 2-bedroom unit with the basement so they could still share a room and they could use the basement as their "clubhouse".

After being there and seeing how much nicer it is, not to mention they are BRAND NEW, I am quite anxious to leave this place. As in, I have a countdown on the refrigerator and I cross off the days!! The kids are looking forward to it, too - even though it isn't our own house and we can't paint or decorate, it will give us more space to move around and settle in. Only 42 more days and we are outta here!!!! Here are a couple pictures of our new place...

The Process of Leaving

This is what we go through each time we want to go somewhere:

- Put my hat, coat, scarf, gloves and boots on
- Put Nolan's hat, coat, gloves and boots on
- Walk out to the parking lot, try to keep Nolan from stepping in the high snow piles, where he would disappear completely
- Unlock car, pray the doors haven't frozen shut, get Nolan in his carseat
- Brush snow/scrape ice of tops, sides and windows of car
- Start engine and crank the heat
- Put the car in reverse, then in drive, then in reverse again until I build up enough momentum to slide sideways out of my parking spot (or do a complete 360 like I did the other day)
- Drive slowly up the hill out of the parking lot, trying to not slide and hit other cars

Then it is another whole process when we get back from going out somewhere...makes me want to stay inside all day!

And So It Begins...

I'm not sure what it is, but over the last few weeks, it seems that our daughter has become a teenager!

While we were on our road trip, we had just finished eating dinner at a restaurant and she said she had to go to the bathroom before we left. So, off she ran to the restroom and then she came back quickly. I knew there was no way she could have gone to the bathroom that fast, so I asked her what was wrong. She said, "Oh, I didn't have to use the bathroom...I just wanted to check my hair."

Then, yesterday we were heading out to run some errands and she got dressed and put her boots on and said to me, "I wish we had a full-length mirror here like we did at home. I need to make sure these boots look okay with my outfit."

I'm not sure where all this is coming from, but I am not encouraging it...the longer we can put off the pre-teen/teenager phase, the better!!