Discovering Joy

Psalm 94: 18-19:
"When I said, 'My foot is slipping',
Your unfailing love, Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me,
Your consolation brought me joy."

I will never forget that moment...when Ryan came to me and said he had decided to take the job in New York. I felt like my world was spinning out of control. I could feel my emotions taking a dive into a downward spiral I was afraid I could never come back from. I truly believed that coming here would ruin me (emotionally speaking). I was completely prepared to enter a deep depression and struggle my way through. I was afraid of what this move would do to me.

So, here we are, one month later. And I stand in awe of what the Lord has done. Not only has He helped me deal with the hardships and staggering life changes we have gone through, but He has inexplicably placed in my heart...JOY! (gasp) How can this be? I can't understand it. Anyone from the outside looking in would think that we have nothing to be thankful for; that we are far worse off than we were before - living in a tiny apartment, facing a bitterly cold climate in an unfamiliar town. But they would be wrong.

The Lord has placed within me a grateful spirit. And what I once thought would be my demise has become a true blessing. Because I am finding light in the darkness. I am seeing the good in every moment. Having a smaller place to live has brought us closer together. The cold weather outside has provided some fun adventures for our family. Maybe having less is a good thing after all. It has made us more thankful for everything we had before; all that we had taken for granted. And it is reminding us of what is really important.

In spite of all the changes and difficulties, our family has never been tighter. Our marriage is thriving. And God is showing Himself in such visible ways that there is no denying His will has brought us here. As Paul says in 2 Corinthians, "Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." He alone deserves the glory...for every good and perfect gift we have is from His hand!!